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Metaphors That Last a Lifetime

13th Apr 2026 by Marian Way in Metaphor

One of the questions people sometimes ask about Clean Language and Symbolic Modelling is whether the work has lasting value, or whether insights gained in a session fade once you're back in ordinary life. In my experience, and in the experience of many colleagues, the metaphors that emerge during a session can be both immediately transformative and surprisingly durable.

Furniture in the Attic - No More

During my very first Clean Language session - on stage as a demonstration subject with James Lawley - I realised I had a massive 'resentment' problem, so booked some further sessions to figure out what I could do about it. In the first of these more private sessions I described how I would dwell on a small incident; it would go round and round in my mind. It was like having a tiny speck of dust on the end of a stick, and winding the stick round in a clockwise motion until the speck got bigger and bigger – as big as a chair or a table. At this size, it was filling all my thinking, so I would put it in a metaphorical attic, up and to my right. Out of sight, out of mind. However, unsurprisingly, it would happen all over again. Something else would upset me, I'd wind myself up about it, it would turn into another piece of furniture and have to be put into the attic.

After a while, the pile of furniture in the attic would become a bit wobbly and difficult to ignore. My solution? Cover it with a red cloth. But this did not stop me from winding up the next thing, and the next and the next, and so on. At some point, there would be no room in the attic and the whole lot would come tumbling down – in the form of tears, an outpouring of all the unfair things that had happened…

Predictably, the pattern would continue with new piles of furniture being created from tiny specks of dust. And I may have continued in this unhappy way for the rest of my life if it wasn't for Symbolic Modelling. During the session, I identified the first time I could recall resentment piling up like this. I was four years old, in hospital, and unhappy about a few (seemingly minor) things that happened and which I must have felt powerless to do anything about. I also recalled a particularly unpleasant nurse and the words she’d used with me. Somehow, it occurred to four-year-old me to skewer this nurse on the end of my 'wind up' stick, and all of a sudden she was being turned round on the end of the stick. She went round and round, very quickly, until she flew off the stick and blew into smithereens! I remember laughing quite hysterically at this time, feeling a bit naughty at what I had done, but also strangely exhilarated. And I can honestly say that I have not felt resentful (in a put-it-in-the-attic kind of way) in the twenty-seven years since the session; this was a particularly valuable and long-lasting metaphor.

This didn't mean people stopped saying and doing things that had the potential to create resentment in me; they did, and they still do. But I didn't just lose a nurse, I also gained a stick, and anytime I notice myself using it to wind up a speck of dust, I simply flick the dust off in the opposite direction. In practice, this means saying or doing something about whatever happened, or truly letting it go. So I not only had a massive change occur during the session, but I also understood my own metaphor for building up resentment and came away with a resource for doing something about it. Twenty-seven years on, my stick still works brilliantly, although I seem to have less need for it as the years go on.

I'm not alone in this. When I invited a few colleagues to share their own experiences of long-lasting metaphors, the stories that came back were just as striking.

Charlotte's Bin

Charlotte Ellis describes how, when she was unwell back in 2011, she explored her symptoms during a Symbolic Modelling session with me. She likened her leg to a bin filled with all kinds of junk - physical, emotional, and environmental – and she knew that to get better, she needed to clear out the junk.

She began making changes (including diet, exercise and meditation), and when she later received a diagnosis, the metaphor stayed with her. She took the prescribed medication for a couple of years, but it felt like putting a sticking plaster over the bin rather than actually emptying it. So she decided to stop the medication and focus on what felt right for her. And she has stayed with this bin-clearing approach ever since. She says, “The metaphor showed me that my path was to focus on my own healing, rather than rely solely on the usual doctor-and-medicine route.”

Jacqueline's Six Bells

Jacqueline Ann Surin recalls a metaphor she developed during an interview with Alyona Silvestrova in 2022. She discovered she had an internal safety mechanism she hadn't previously been aware of: six bells attached by string to a brake lever, which ring one by one each time something makes her feel uncomfortable or unsafe. By the time all six are jangling, a crystallising anger activates a strong metal shield that makes her indifferent to social pressure and able to set firm boundaries. Having this metaphor made conscious allowed her to act on early warning signs, and she has also discovered that sometimes even two bells ringing is enough.

She now says, “The metaphor has helped me notice when I'm being harassed and when to dial up or dial down my defence shield. But what's been even more amazing is that the six bells metaphor has been generative; it hasn't just served me, but others, too. Recently, I was supporting a victim of sexual harassment in my dance community. After she read my blog, and started writing her report about the harassment she had endured, she realised that she had ignored all the alarm bells that were going off for her, during the harassment. Once she had the six bells metaphor as a way to understand what the perpetrator had been doing to her, she realised she was NOT crazy and NOT imagining things. And only last week, she employed the metaphor again to notice what another man was doing. She was able to assert her boundaries (something she found really hard to do before), and then after his response (he apologised and showed he would respect her wishes), she was able to dial the bells down.”

Caitlin's Mosh Pit

Caitlin’s long-lasting metaphor example appeared over twenty years ago when she was being facilitated to discover, “When you’re learning at your best, you’re like what?” For Caitlin, it’s like being in a mosh pit, where she can feel completely free to be herself and to make mistakes. In the metaphor, she has to check that no one is drinking too much and make sure that when people bump into each other, they stay friendly (“Alright mate?”) rather than being aggressive (“You made me spill my drink!”), and when these safety precautions are taken care of, it can feel very exhilarating. She knows that if she falls, ten pairs of hands will pick her up and stop her hitting the ground.

She says, “I’ve always stuck with this metaphor – partly to inform others about the way I like to work – high intensity then stop – and partly to remind me to seek out people I want to learn with, so I can experience this exhilaration and joy. They need to be other adults who are able to self-regulate. Now I am looking to fields other than Clean Language to discover who else is able to create an environment for mosh-pit-type experiences. I’m thinking of music jam sessions and improv groups – and there must be others…”

What strikes me, reading these accounts together, is that none of us set out to acquire a long-lasting resource. The metaphors emerged from genuine exploration of resentment, of illness, of safety, of learning, and then stayed, simply because they are true.

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About Marian Way

A highly skilled facilitator and trainer, Marian, who founded Clean Learning in 2001, has developed and delivered training across the world. She is the author of Clean Approaches for Coaches, co-author, with James Lawley, of Insights in Space and co-author, with Caitlin Walker, of So you want to be… #DramaFree.

Marian is an expert Clean facilitator, an adept modeller, a programme writer and an inspirational trainer. She has a natural ability to model existing structures, find the connections between them and design new ways for people to learn. Marian was a leading innovator within the Weight Watchers organisation, which included developing the “points” strategy, a local idea that went on to become a global innovation. She is a director of both Clean Learning and Training Attention CIC, world leaders in clean applications for corporate, educational and community development. She designs our programmes and workbooks, leads workshops and teaches on all our courses. She’s trained people in Great Britain, Russia, Sweden, Germany, Australia, Japan and the USA. Marian is also a recognised Clean Assessor.